Saturday, 19 November 2011


What His Bad Habit Says About Him

Manly Manners

 

By Natasha Burton

From leaving the toilet seat up to crunching ice, certain male behaviors can really get under our skin. In order to find out if these actions are really just harmless or could signify something important about the man performing them, we asked human behavior expert Patrick Wanis, Ph.D. to analyze ten common bad habits.

Always Calling Mom

A man who has to call his mother in order to make a decision “hasn’t found his own independence or identity,” Wanis says. This bad habit is problematic if you’d like to create a lasting union with this man. “He won’t be able to be there for you when you really need him,” Wanis says. “He won’t turn to you for his support system, because his mother is his support system. He’s still seeking Mummy’s approval.”

Leaving His Dishes

Men who put their dirty plates in the sink and forget about them are thoughtless, according to Wanis. “They are not considerate of you,” he says. “They’re not clean, neat or organized. This behavior can also mean they are very slapdash in the way they respond to things; they may be procrastinators.”

Leaving the Seat Up

When men do this, Wanis says, “they’re too interested in being right rather than being happy.” Wanis maintains that guys shouldn’t look at the act of putting the seat down as a loss of manhood because sometimes the toilet seat can be the sign of a power struggle. “Little things like this can reflect larger, deeper problems in the relationship,” he says.

Not Opening Doors

“Depending on the relationship, this behavior can mean a man is not being thoughtful, but it can also mean he’s not a romantic. He’s not being protective.” Women like to know they are special, Wanis says. When a guy is unchivalrous, “he’s not thinking about how to excite a woman and turn her on.”

Picking His Nose

This is a gross one. “Obviously, this is a sign of being unhygienic and having a poor upbringing or lack of social etiquette,” Wanis says. A man who blatantly picks his nose is not thinking how his actions affect those around him. “It can also mean he’s very selfish because he’s not thinking about you.”

Biting His Nails

This behavior signifies insecurity, nervousness, extreme stress and an inability of self-expression, Wanis says. “This is not someone who is calm, relaxed …. It doesn’t really indicate hygiene issues; it talks more about psychological, mental and emotional issues.”

Cussing

Men who have foul mouths “don’t understand the power of words,” Wanis says. “Their language can be really offensive and hurtful to others.” However, you must take this habit in context, Wanis says. “If it’s a group of guys cussing at a football game, who cares? Guys can cuss at each other and it’s no big deal. They don’t get as easily offended.” Their use of language, he says, is a reflection of masculinity and marks a difference between genders.

Procrastinating

“Procrastination comes from a fear of failure, and it can be related to laziness,” Wanis explains. Men who procrastinate, he says, don’t like to take on the really tough stuff and may not be easily dependable in times of need. A procrastinator is typically not a goal-oriented person.

Crunching Ice

Many of us are familiar with our guys performing this ritual every time they get a soft drink. Wanis says “it signifies macho-aggressiveness: ‘I’m strong, I’m tough. I crush the can in my hands and the ice in my teeth.’” But unlike some other bad habit behaviors, Wanis says, “I don’t think this has any particular underlying motivation. I don’t believe a guy should change every habit he has to appease a woman, because then he’s no longer going to be a guy.”

Slurping Food

A man who is a loud eater is, at a subconscious level, trying to get you to notice him, Wanis says. “He’s unknowingly engaging in behavior that gets him negative attention and either wants to be scolded or, no matter what it takes, just wants attention.”

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